“I’m a Therapist, Podcaster, Speaker, and Advocate for Human Empowerment and Conscious Living.’
HOW IT ALL STARTED
How did I get here? That is a question I often get asked fairly often. So here’s my story.
The “Good Girl Programming”
From my earliest memories, I wore the label of the “good girl” like a badge of honor. Always striving to meet the standards set by family, friends, and society, I became an expert in appeasing, in listening, in being the person everyone else wanted and expected me to be.
It was a role I knew all too well, one that was rewarded with praise, validation, and a sense of belonging.
The Illusion of Adulthood
Just like the Disney movies where everything ended in “Happily Ever After”, that was how I led my life, for a majority of my living years. I always had this perspective that things would work out on its own, and “bad” things like Heartbreak and Loss won’t hit me so hard.
But when I experienced my first heartbreak, the pain felt so surreal. It was something I never imagined for my mind and body to ever experience.
I suddenly got lost in this sea of emotions – it felt like being thrown in the deep end of the ocean, and being handed a map in a language I couldn’t comprehend.
The rosy pictures painted by movies and tales of earlier generations didn’t match the intricate maze I found myself in.
It led to me to question everything I knew about life and how it’s meant to be navigated.
It was a dark and scary place to be in.
I soon realized that the ‘good girl’ programming didn’t translate into genuine happiness or a fulfilled life. It didn’t help me in those times I needed to stand up for myself, to set boundaries and to firmly walk away from toxic unhealthy situations – because deep down, I didn’t genuinely believed I deserved better.
Adulthood was a hard time, because it felt like I had to unlearn and relearn new ways to live my life.
Wishing the Pain Away
For the longest time, I believed in the power of wishful thinking. Every time a hint of pain, a memory, or a shadow of regret surfaced, I’d mentally push it away, believing that if I didn’t attend to it, it would simply fade.
I wore a smile, even if it was a little strained, and I tried to ‘stay positive’, believing that pain, like a cloud, would eventually drift away if ignored.
Behind the Mask of Denial
In not attending to my pain, I wasn’t making it disappear. Instead, I was allowing it to settle deep within.
Pain was becoming part of my identity, one which I did not know how to separate from…and that tremendously scared me.
As days turned into months and then years, the pain I wished away didn’t just stay silent.
It began to manifest in unexpected ways…
- Sleepless nights
- Anxiety
- Depression
- Emptiness
- Being with emotionally unavailable people
And this list went on.
By ignoring my pain, I had inadvertently given it a louder voice that was centered around fear.
The Turning Point
Then came the turning point.
I told myself that enough is enough.
The pain of staying the same, became overwhelmingly greater than the pain of change – that was when I knew I could not hide from it any longer.
I could no longer run from myself, because the longer and further I did, the more shattered I felt within.
That exhaustion was what sparked the beginning of my self-discovery journey, and the desire to seek answers for my healing.
I knew the road ahead won’t be easy, but I was willing to give myself a chance to live life again.
I mean, I had to…If I didn’t, who would?
Discovering Nervous System Healing
The lack of an integrated mind-body lens on how trauma is being viewed and treated, was frustrating.
Traditional approaches to healing trauma was giving me the same disempowering message of
“What is wrong with you?”
“Why can’t you just let it go?”
Healing trauma seemed to be trying to fix a problematic mind – something which I felt was tragically wrong in approaching treating psychological struggles.
What you suppress, the body remembers.
Through my own healing and learning from world-renowned trauma experts, I discovered that deep healing occurs at a somatic and cellular level, because the human body, in its infinite wisdom, holds onto memories, sensations, and emotions.
By tapping into the profound intelligence of our body, we can unlock doors to understanding pains and traumas that have been long buried.
Guiding Others Through Healing
As a trauma-trained therapist, my work involves helping clients access, unpack, and heal powerful childhood wounds by safely reconnecting them with their bodies, emotions, and sensations that had been disconnected and fragmented due to trauma.
I believe in honoring each client’s uniqueness and incorporating a holistic set of treatment modalities.
Every pain story deserves to be heard and seen honorably.
Yours is no different.
